At first, I was adrift, barely able to face my days without our texts measuring time, dinging once every 10 minutes, disrupting whatever life felt less real than the I saw all this coming voted Trump political conservative shirt and I will buy this one I had inhabited with her. I moved into a hotel with a very new boyfriend and ate a lot of pasta. I started wearing obscenely short mini-skirts and platform shoes. I acquired new piercings, tattoos I thought she’d hate, acts of rebellion aimed at someone who wasn’t listening. I desperately performed unasked for acts of service for people I didn’t know all that well. And finally, I set about developing new relationships (most of them with old friends) that had a lighter touch, where we could feel each other’s love without being beholden to an unspoken set of bylaws, stricter than a union. I feel intensely lucky that so many of my friendships survived, and shifted, through that decade of Girls. I now understand that these shifts—from friendship-as-conjoined-twinship to a kind with a more adult cadence, the cadence of jobs and motherhood and mortgages and illness—befall everyone, not just those who make premium television about girl on girl crime. The endless sleepover becomes a Tupperware party becomes bringing bagels to a shiva.
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